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# RE: Re: What does it mean to become noble concerning passions?

#### Message 03531 of 3835

- To: <BardonPraxis@yahoogroups.com>
- Subject: RE: [BardonPraxis] Re: What does it mean to become noble concerning passions?
- From: "Lori V Weber" <lorivw@...>
- Date: Tue, 25 Jan 2005 07:33:49 -0500
- Importance: Normal
- In-reply-to: <003901c50251$f4ca43b0$0bb63542@ownerbqacdlzy6>

    It's like realizing that knee-jerk responses which may have served well
    in the past are now just emotional juvenile delinquents. When I'd
    realize that I was choosing a response that five minutes later I'd
    regret, I'd say to myself "Oh, there you are you
    'yell-first-think-later' response! If I use you now, my kids will tune
    me out next time and I'll feel guilty as soon as I shut up. I think
    I'll just be quiet and think of another response." One of my early
    resistance mechanisms was to think that by exercising self control and
    making a different choice that would align w/ my mirror work, others
    would think I was wishy-washy and soft. But actually, the amount of
    awareness and discipline I had to muster was incredible. And, I found
    that I was putting what others thought ahead of my own work - and in
    nearly all cases, no one cared anyway! This realization was liberating.

    BTW, I still slip, but now I can get over it much more quickly.
    Sometimes, I think it's arrogance that keeps many wallowing in how awful
    they think they are. I think that was my problem. I was loathe to let
    go of being right that I was a horrible person. Because then what? I'd
    actually have to be good ;-)

    lori

    And Jerry - Go Tribe!

    -----Original Message-----
    From: Rawn Clark [mailto:rawnclark@...]
    Sent: Monday, January 24, 2005 3:04 PM
    To: BardonPraxis@yahoogroups.com
    Subject: Re: [BardonPraxis] Re: What does it mean to become noble
    concerning passions?

    Dear Jerry,

    >> I was concerned that many of my negative flaws actually have a
    positive contribution to my personality. In other words there is
    something valuable in the flaw, a hidden agenda that over the long run
    is positive. Perhaps some behaviors are there to teach me to have more
    fun, or quit taking things so seriously etc. However the behavior is
    still a quality I do not wish to have and is a part of my shadow, so it
    will be dealt with in due time. I am looking very carefully at trying to
    find what the negative behaviors are trying to teach me about myself,
    and perhaps adding in additional positive habits to my white
    mirror....purposely developing them in myself, in order to fulfill these
    needs. <<

    A beneficial way in which to examine your negative Mirror is to consider
    that at one time, each negative characteristic began as a response to a
    positive need. At the time of origin, most negative characteristics
    were *unconscious* and *automatic* responses to that positive need, and
    it may, at the time, have been a positive reaction. However, over time
    those positive responses became habitual and served your need in a less
    and less positive way as you matured, resulting in a *negative* trait
    now. But still at their root was an original positive need. Through
    self-examination, it is possible to discover whether or not that
    original positive need still exists and if it does, then it is also
    possible to figure out a *conscious* and *intentional* positive way to
    meet that need.

    My best to you,
    :) Rawn Clark
    24 Jan 2005
    rawnclark@...
    rawn@...
    http://www.ABardonCompanion.com
    http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BardonPraxis
    http://E.webring.com/hub?ring=arionthebardonwe

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    - From: "Rawn Clark" <rawnclark@...>

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