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# Re: Step I Questions

#### Message 01744 of 3835

- To: BardonPraxis@yahoogroups.com
- Subject: Re: [BardonPraxis] Step I Questions
- From: Allen Kray <sourceport@...>
- Date: Mon, 10 Nov 2003 09:04:36 -0800 (PST)
- In-reply-to: <boo5t5+pa2q@eGroups.com>

    Hello Daniel,

    > First, about Thought Control:
    > When I start the exercise, my mind is a pretty quiet
    > and peaceful
    > place. Just about nothing transpires inside. After a
    > short while, I
    > suddenly start getting thoughts like "what should I
    > be thinking
    > about?", "am I even doing this right?", "the
    > thoughts from before
    > which did rise were [...].", "perhaps I should ask
    > about this in the
    > online message board?", "these thoughts seem like
    > thoughts which
    > describe what I'm observing, and yet I seem to
    > observe them happening
    > actively in my mind? Does it mean that I'm not
    > observing anymore?".
    > Indeed, am I doing it right? Am I not the observer
    > anymore once I
    > start thinking about what I observe, or something
    > like that?
    >

    The same thing happens to me as well. Though, I find
    that if I just accept this chatter I create, other
    noise creeps up out of nowhere - images, strange
    expressions, etc. Sometimes I just even hear myself
    just saying, "blah blah blah" and an interesting image
    pops up out of nowhere and I just start observing from
    there...

    > As for the breathing and Eucharistic exerices:
    > Before now, I used to think about my wish in words
    > (e.g. "I bless
    > this soup with willpower. I have a tremendous force
    > of will. I can
    > resist all temptations, [etc]."
    > I felt that is needed, because I found out that I
    > don't exactly have
    > a complete internal definition for the word
    > "willpower", so I had to
    > clarify what exactly did I mean.
    > Now, when I bless my food/before each breath, I
    > visualize the
    > following 2 short scenes: I'm in bed, under a comfy
    > blanket, and the
    > alarm clock rings. I turn it off, and continue
    > sleeping. A big red X
    > appears on the image. Then, I'm in bed again, and
    > the alarm clock
    > rings. Instead of turning it off, I rise, and go to
    > do my business. A
    > big green V appears.
    > Then, while eating/circulating the breath in my
    > body, I continue to
    > verbally hold/repeat the thought just like before.
    > I feel that this is much better, as I know ~exactly~
    > what I mean,
    > instead of that ambigous (to me) "willpower".
    > Is that okay?
    >

    I experimented with this in the beginning and I find
    very specific images of myself doing something is very
    effective. For example, I imagine a concrete little
    film of myself doing cleaning chores and then condense
    it in my food and drink. After a few meals, I feel
    compelled then to do my laundry and clean the house.
    This way is very effective for me. If I use the same
    little film as well in the breathing exercises, then
    the thought of cleaning lingers constantly in the
    front of my mind until I realize that little film in
    physical motion. Great stuff!

    Sincerely,
    Allen

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- References:
  - Step I Questions
    - From: "Daniel Gutmanas" <noxerus@...>

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