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# a question or two..

#### Message 00483 of 3835

- To: BardonPraxis@yahoogroups.com
- Subject: a question or two..
- From: "chenxsi <chenxsi@...>" <chenxsi@...>
- Date: Thu, 20 Feb 2003 15:41:33 -0000
- User-agent: eGroups-EW/0.82

    I've read a couple of messages saying that if u enter into emptiness
    of mind from your one-pointed focus, u will get deeper and deeper
    into the true meaning of the point of focus.

    But why is it tat i can't feel as if i have gone deeper into the
    meaning of my focus?? I have just started my emptiness of mind
    exercise...is tat the reason why?

    Anyway i have this question tat have been confusing me for months. I
    like acting, and often act a lot of charactors, but the problem
    always goes like this---I would first decide upon a charactor to act
    as. I would use the technique actors often use, to Feel, Think & Do,
    meaning to feel what it feels like to be tat charactor (emotions
    etc..), to think of the intent of that charactor, and to simply do
    what u have to do on stage.

    Initially, i would be so successful tat i sometimes forgot who i am
    for a while, and simply believe tat i AM tat charactor. However this
    succes is ALWAYS short-lived. After a few days, i would always wake
    up one day, and simply cannot feel or act as tat charactor anymore.
    This is rather frustrating, as people would often wonder why i seem
    to have lost the ability tat i once have.

    Observing my mind, there seem to be a "feeling" tat i have lost the
    ability to act, and many thoughts tat suggest tat i have lost the
    ability. I would exclude all these negative thoughts, but in the end
    my mind would be so blank tat i cannot act. Acting requires a
    natural flow of thoughts to my mind, but there seem to be a demon in
    my mind blocking this flow of thoughts to assist in my acting. Can
    someone enlighten me about this??

    Sorry for writing so much!

    -Near to Insanity

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